All Hope Is Gone

The previous night was a very short night. I slept so early that night and when I woke up this morning, I almost couldn't recognise where am I or even worser, who am I. I was perfectly blurred and it made me felt like I'm a body without soul. Maybe my soul was still wandering in my goodnight's sweetdream, as I had been too long inside there last night. Hm..thats odd..

Looking into the mirror..uhh..wow..Looks like the mosquitoes just had a party on my face last night while I was totally unconscious. So sickening.. I hate those tiny little annoying creatures..

After I had my bath, I dragged myself to my studying desk, trying to absorb something from the books, but somethings seems to be not right. As I look into the books, I see something else. Ahh.. I can't focus! And I don't know why..

So I closed the books and let my thoughts out.. I tried to remember everything that had just happened to me lately. Everything that had droven me here. hundreds of miles away from my hometown. Afew months ago, my dreams wasn't lies over here. I've once have a dream of being a pilot and working with MAS. But my mom said no. My academic qualifications had also denied me. So I gave up with pilot and tried to think all over again about what I mostly proned to. Later I got the answer that I think had mostly suited myself; the aircraft engineer. I was so fascinated to the modern technology of the aircrafts, how they operated, their aerodynamic structure,and their futuristic designs. The sky had also captivated me; how I was so eager to touch them. That time I was so sure thet the career was the perfect career to me. Yes, I should go for it!

But now, after months and months of waiting, my dreams and hopes are getting thinner and thinner, by day. I think I've lost my faith in it, cause I don't think the METC will have their second call for me.Seems like dreams of touching the sky, will just remain to be just dreams. Dreams that I will never going to achieve, no matter how long I wait. So I think, this is the last time I mention about METC and aircraft engineer, I'm giving up from now on. I will now just focus on my life here in USIM and the course I'm taking here, pleased or not =(