All Hope Is Gone

The previous night was a very short night. I slept so early that night and when I woke up this morning, I almost couldn't recognise where am I or even worser, who am I. I was perfectly blurred and it made me felt like I'm a body without soul. Maybe my soul was still wandering in my goodnight's sweetdream, as I had been too long inside there last night. Hm..thats odd..

Looking into the mirror..uhh..wow..Looks like the mosquitoes just had a party on my face last night while I was totally unconscious. So sickening.. I hate those tiny little annoying creatures..

After I had my bath, I dragged myself to my studying desk, trying to absorb something from the books, but somethings seems to be not right. As I look into the books, I see something else. Ahh.. I can't focus! And I don't know why..

So I closed the books and let my thoughts out.. I tried to remember everything that had just happened to me lately. Everything that had droven me here. hundreds of miles away from my hometown. Afew months ago, my dreams wasn't lies over here. I've once have a dream of being a pilot and working with MAS. But my mom said no. My academic qualifications had also denied me. So I gave up with pilot and tried to think all over again about what I mostly proned to. Later I got the answer that I think had mostly suited myself; the aircraft engineer. I was so fascinated to the modern technology of the aircrafts, how they operated, their aerodynamic structure,and their futuristic designs. The sky had also captivated me; how I was so eager to touch them. That time I was so sure thet the career was the perfect career to me. Yes, I should go for it!

But now, after months and months of waiting, my dreams and hopes are getting thinner and thinner, by day. I think I've lost my faith in it, cause I don't think the METC will have their second call for me.Seems like dreams of touching the sky, will just remain to be just dreams. Dreams that I will never going to achieve, no matter how long I wait. So I think, this is the last time I mention about METC and aircraft engineer, I'm giving up from now on. I will now just focus on my life here in USIM and the course I'm taking here, pleased or not =(

I'm living a new life

When I was on the facebook today, just now, I'm so ashamed with myself. Its a creepy feelings overwhelming me all over.. I'm so on shame..

Its Friday, but I'm still, not on the books.. That thing really disrupt my mind.. I can't forget it.. Oh God..

Really hope I will recover soon..Real do..

Tags From Biela

Yup, I'm on holiday but it doesn't mean that I'm free from all the workloads.. Its something that will never ends.. Never.. Well just look on what I already got right now.. Assignments, assignments and nothing, but assignments..

Huh.. Seems like procrastinations isn't a great idea.. I'm already screwed up..

But anyway, my life isn't just about the assignments (its never about assignments, actually) Coz a life of assignments isn't a life, truly.. Its all about casualties and miseries.. And of course I'm not going to ruin my exciting 18 life of an adolescence by letting my crucial holiday time overwhelmed by the annoying assignments and workloads..  What are you thinking? Nope I won't..

So, if I were given options whether to break my back working on the assignments all along the holiday to please the lecturer, or to stay relaxed all the time and get 100 strokes of rattan plus more assignments from the lecturer after returning from the holiday, I guess there will be no doubt for me to choose the 2nd one. No hesitations.

I can't afford losing my holiday, my only holiday where I got my sole chance to free my mind from the sickening campus life.. No..

Hm, whatever..Forget it..Oh, this are my answers, Miss Biela =)

# 3 Pseudonyms Of You

Angah
Dely
Joe (what a shame..how ridiculous,but yes, I've once used to be called with this hilarious nickname)

#5 Important Dates For You To Keep In Mind

28/9/92
31/8/57 (I'm not that patriotic, but pathetically sometimes..whoa, how nerd xP)
My father's birthday
My mom's as well
Err.. Eid.. Probably.. xD

#5 Things You've Just Done Yesterday

Sleep
Sleep
Sleep
Sleep
..and finally arised.. (what? I'm a nocturnal okayy =)

#5 Things That Makes You Happy

Having a brand new laptop
Enough and more than enough sleep
My motorbike
Being home
Football and all that relates

#5 of your favourite dramas

Chuck
Greek
Eli Stone
Starsky and Hutch
err..Dramaking.. hehe.. (no idea at all, I'm not so obsessed with TV ok..)

#5 hobbies

Riding motorbike
Reading (look how nerd I am xD)
Fishing, sometimes..
Blogging
Watching movies

#5 dream spots to visit

Pulau Redang
Hawaii
Venice, perhaps (I don't know why)
Egypt
Pulau Perhentian (boring..)

#5 reasons why I should answer these

Boring
Boring
Boring
Coz you asked me to..
...erm well, at least I got something to post as updates..~

#5 people to tag?

You?..
Me?...
Hmm..
No one.. Huhu..





Hehe..sorry for converting it into English...I'm just trying to improve my English..



~thanks Biela anyway~

Last But Not Least

Finally I've made it! Thank God.. Alhamdulillah.. Both worrying exams of the week, Biology and Maths had finally over..  And both were exams which I had the least studies on them, ever since I've been studying here in USIM, reasoning from the bad fever I just recovered just now.. Uhh, I couldn't imagine how my results gonna be.. Hopefully it wouldn't gonna be too bad..

Well, anyway, I can't be too comfit with that coz I know, being here, exams are plenty enough for me to stay relax. In every single week, there shall be at least one exam.. Yeah, in which it means that in every week I had here, I will have to work on my studies for the exams almost all the time. But if that sounds troubling to you, you should think about all the assignments and workloads that are accumulating on my desk everyday, every week.. So yes, it is troubling...! So so troubling..

Till now I still don't get it why on earth the singer, Lenka says that 'trouble is a friend' in her song.. Huhu..





Whatever..

What I Am Going To Do??

OMG..

6/7/2010

I had a headache.. Maybe coz the lecture hall was too freezing.. Freezing me to death, as always..Even I had my sweater on, but there are no different at all.. ( I hate DKS 1.5!!)

That night I had a bad feeling on myself.. Oh no, I got a fever... And that night I didn't study anything.. That was worrying.. The exams were coming, in two more days.. Ohh..

7/7/2010

I woke up dizzily this morning.. Still feverish.. Uhh.. Tomorrow I'm gonna have my exams, but I couldn't study yet.. How pathetic..

Ya Allah.. Help me.. What to do now.. Just hoping that I will be back to health by tonight.. Tonight was the only chance for me to study something, at least, prepare something for tomorrow..





-.-