Which Way Am I Going To??

"Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both,

And be one traveler, long I stood,

And looked down one as far as I could,

To where it bent in the undergrowth.."

Sounds familiar huh? Uhuhu..


Yeah, its the famous 'Road Not Taken' by Robert Frost; one of the famous poems that we learned in f5. And the reason I brought it up here, in this post actually just because its just came up in my mind that the poem was just a perfect poem to describe the situation I'm stucking right now; the situation of stucking in a quite critical dilemma in my life on deciding which way am I going to after this..uh..


To be just, yeah, I'm really doomed right now. Theres no other way for me to describe how hard this situation served me right now. Thinking 'bout such a thing would just left me stressed and off the mood all the day.

"Take away the sensation inside,

Bitter sweet migraine in my head,

Its like a throbbing toothache of the mind,

I can't take this feeling anymore.."

Its Green Day's Give Me Novacaine. Well I think the whole lyrics there was the correct wordthat defines how the tension served me pain. Exactly.


(I don't really know since when I starts describing things that way..seriously..) xD


Why must I be stressed? Its not so hard; just think a lil bit about it, pick it and think no more. Anyway with my SPM result 6a's, I am qualified to be somewhere. Isn't its right dude? Well I'll say its not.


Its not so easy for me you know. Never that easy. Yeah, its true I can be somewhere. Theres always somewhere I can be with the 6a's. For example, I can go to matrics somewhere, or taking diploma somewhere, or foundation somewhere, or even pre-university/form 6 somewhere too.. Thats is with certain criterias I qualify..


But look, I must be considerate to lots of things; everything before choosing an option. Everything, like the course, scholarships, my capabilities, my qualifications, the authorities and priorities on the course I'm applying, adaptations, interest, how this, how that etc.. Every single it requires..


I'll tell you what.. Here's the options I have in mind:


1. Matrics : Its too risky for me. And me myself not sure if i'm really capable to get through it. Yes,its the fastest route to degree, but the risks I take is much more worrying me if I go to the matrics. I just don't have the confidence.


2. Diploma : Better and safer. But I'm confused about the course I should take that suits me and my qualifications.


3. Foundation : I don't see if there's any course that really suits me with my qualification that served in foundation. Plus, it is not possible for me to take medics (i love medics, or any other relating to biology) with just B+ in Biology..huhu..how pathetic..


4. Form 6 : Never an option for me actually (I hate schools!)...............>>i'll take it as the last option.


Looking to that, I know you'll say that I'm quite fussy. Well ya, I admit it. I'm fussy in deciding things. Its really hard for me to be the one who decides, especially when it comes to such important things, just like this. It become more complicated for me.


You can say I'm a pessimist too. Again, you were right too. But I think there's nothing wrong about that. I need to think from different views on this matter to decide the best option for me. I can't be pretty optimistic all the time. Right?


OMG.. This is really hard for me..


Which way am I going to??