Saturday, October 8, 2011

I Am Not A Good Guy


Into the cafe. In the middle of the class. Down the corridor. By the roadside. Anywhere.

Why did when I walked in front of a crowd at anywhere, everyone is eyeballing me? Don't stare at me please, I don't deserve them..

I am not a guy that is worth seeing. I am a very false guy, I did lots of wrong things. If you give me that attention, I will deceive you. People said I am a good boy, but I am truly not. Judge me form the way I look, and you are making a great mistake. I just looks like a any other USIM students who wear songkok and keep a smart look, but no I am absolutely not that good. Wearing songkok doesn't make me any better, but I just looks like one when I do. I am a boy who did lots of mistakes and offenses.

Just don't look at me.. 

I don't manifest myself, with my appearance. I don't own a good look, and I don't own a good heart. I always wanted to commit sins and wrong things many times. Like, when I always prioritizing my own desire than other peoples needs. I would do anything to please myself and to make myself happy, coz that is all what I am concerning at all time.. I am a bad guy.

To those who become my friends, if you are going to list your friends from the worst to the best, please be sure to put my name at the bottom. Coz I am your worst friend, ever. I always think of myself before you. All I care first is my own feelings, and yours and the others don't always mean a thing to me. To say that I'm a friend who appreciate his friends, is totally overrated. I am really not. Have you ever saw me brought you a cake during your birthday? Or be the shoulder for you to cry when you were sad? Or gave you all the assistance you need when you asked? No.

Please don't look at me. Get me away from your sight, coz I don't deserve it.

:(

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

everyone deserves a second chance, and even after the second chance, there can always be another chance. Even God forgives people who beg for forgiveness although they made mistakes many times. Give yourself a chance to become a better person. You're not stuck being a bad person forever..You think you're all that, but you never know. Maybe there are people who think you're good looking and a nice person. Those are actually subjective things. People have their own taste. SO CHEER UP AND GIVE YOURSELF A CHANCE.
p/s: there's no other place to lean on except our Almighty God.

Anonymous said...

Bring cakes and give a shoulder to cry on,sounds good. But for me; Sebaik-baik sahabat, adalah yang mendoakan saudaranya, dalam diam. Apa yang dizahirkan, dihargai tapi doa... lebih bermakna. Allahua'lam.

*Setuju juga dgn 1st Anonymous.